Lose Weight Through Great Sex with Celebrities! (the Elvis Way)

Devotees of supermarket tabloids will double over with laughter at McEnroe's ( Swimming Chickens ) spoofs. Comprised of case histories ``conscientiously fabricated'' from items read in checkout lines, this self-help satire holds nothing sacred. McEnroe pontificates with riotous charm, sending up superstars (``The Man Who Mistook Himself for Michael Jackson's Love Child'') and talk shows (``The Compulsive Geraldomaniac''). On the question of eating red meat, the author is at his goofy best: Anti-Steak, ``a magic-bullet substance,'' is being developed to counteract side effects of beef and, in the industry's Cattle Reef Project, cows are bred to breathe underwater to ``thus acquire the many healthful aspects of fish.'' Five ``Lost Ann Landers Letters,'' interspersed throughout, push that column to the outer limits. Few of the inflated, self-promoting or self-absorbed preoccupations of contemporary America escape McEnroe's sting. (Sept.)