cover image No More Clueless Sex: 10 Secrets to a Sex Life That Works for Both of You

No More Clueless Sex: 10 Secrets to a Sex Life That Works for Both of You

Gail Elizabeth Wyatt. John Wiley & Sons, $22.95 (211pp) ISBN 978-0-471-19485-9

There are countless books on sexuality designed to help readers get in touch with their wild sides and explore various kinks; there are also plenty that offer detailed pointers on technique. This strictly vanilla book, however, isn't one of them. Sex therapists and spouses Gail and Lewis Wyatt make it clear from the get-go that their guide is more about the emotions and the complications of sexual relationships than it is about sexual technique.""All successful major breakthroughs in sexual pleasure and relationships begin with self-awareness,"" they declare, and their book aims to help readers rid themselves of bad influences (such as excessive use of drugs or porn), practice active communication with their partners and control their own sexual boundaries. With chapters devoted to""sex secrets"" like""you don't have to fake it if your relationship is real,"" the Wyatts dispense much reassuring and forthright advice that should be especially welcomed by those readers who want to reconcile their sexual needs with their religious beliefs. They suggest, for example, that readers recite this affirmation of their sexuality each morning:""My gift is everything that I am. I have the capacity for love, passion and a belief in God...My gift belongs to God and to me."" Sometimes the authors' views on what constitutes""healthy"" sex are a bit narrow. The Wyatts are opposed to ever mixing pain with pleasure, and seem to believe that a desire for S/M games is always a sign of emotional problems, never just a curious spirit. And they appear to regard sex as a generally""dangerous"" and""risky"" activity that should only be undertaken with a carefully chosen and committed partner. Readers who agree with these opinions and are looking for tips to deepen the intimacy of their sexual relationships will find helpful advice in this volume.