The Secrets of Surviving Infidelity

While keyed specifically to meet the needs of couples coping with the shock and pain of an affair, this vital guide from marriage and infidelity expert Haltzman (The Secrets of Happy Families) contains cogent advice for anyone in a troubled relationship. Drawing from know-how accrued not from having an affair, but from online surveys and years of working as a psychiatrist, Haltzman guides readers toward an understanding of why people resort to infidelity, explaining to transgressors how to end an affair in four steps, understand why they cheated, control impulses, make an appropriate apology, and rebuild trust. On the other hand, he helps the innocent parties take stock of their emotions, let go of anger, and decide if and when they’re ready to repair the relationship. Chapters on managing expectations, effective communication techniques, and conflict resolution are particularly resonant and useful. Ultimately, his approach can be summed up in the wise axiom, “You can either fight to be right or fight to be married.” (June)