cover image Darling, You Can’t Do Both: And Other Noise to Ignore on Your Way Up

Darling, You Can’t Do Both: And Other Noise to Ignore on Your Way Up

Janet Kestin and Nancy Vonk. HarperCollins, $19.99 trade paper (304p) ISBN 978-1-55468-581-3

Drawing on their experience as leaders in a “notoriously sexist industry,” Kestin and Vonk, coauthors of Pick Me Up and former cochief creative officers of Ogilvy & Mather Toronto, leap into the debate about women in the workplace. Much of what they say will be familiar; for example, they argue that women must eliminate “self-sabotaging behaviors,” such as not expressing opinions, or cleaning up, literally and metaphorically, while the men get on with networking. Is it news that there’s no perfect way to combine motherhood and career? Some of their advice is bafflingly banal: it’s hard, but important to figure out “how to have the life we want,” the authors write. The conceit of the book—it’s organized around “rules to be broken”—is confusing. However, some insights are bracing: the authors suggest that women are so busy that they fail to take care of themselves, down to neglecting doctors’ appointments. The most urgent sections deal with women’s refusal to support other women and the importance of talking concretely with colleagues about salary (do it, even if it feels clumsy), but, overall, the book is uneven. [em](Oct.) [/em]