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Body Language 101

February 12, 2008
A very warm Beyond Her Book welcome to our super guest, Margie Lawson, psychologist, presenter, and writer.  She is a kinesics specialist, an expert on body language. A former college professor, she taught psychology and communication courses at the post-graduate level. Margie teaches on-line courses and presents full-day master classes and workshops across the U.S. and overseas, including Auckland, New Zealand and Melbourne, Australia. 

Barbara -- Thank you for inviting me back to guest blog.  I’m hooked on your blog -- but I wish I could see you.  I want to analyze your facial expressions, your vocal cues, your posture.  I bet your blog followers would love to see you react to their posts!  (I bet they would and I'm sometimes glad they can't!)

Let's start with a True/False quiz that I developed called Body Language 101.

1.  Ninety-three percent of communication is nonverbal. T F

2.  If people say the right words, it doesn’t matter how they say them. T F

3.  Some people wait a few seconds before showing their nonverbal response. T F

4.  Body language can only be interpreted one way. T  F

5.  People unconsciously mirror nonverbal behavior of others. T F

6.  If the words and body language contradict each other, the listener believes the body language. T F

7.  Facial expressions convey 85% of the nonverbal message. T F

8.  People can cover up their emotions by keeping their face blank. T F

9.  Lips carry more nonverbal messages than eyes. T F

10. When anxious, people touch their face more often.  T F

STOP! Did you take the quiz?  Ready for the answers?

1. TRUEIt’s a monstrous percentage -- which is why people should monitor their nonverbals. Let’s look at the number one phobia in the U.S. – public speaking. If you’re nervous you may display a cluster of anxiety flags, e.g., rolling in lips, tightening mouth, evasive eye contact, halting gait, soft voice, modulated voice tones. If your anxiety escalates, your nonverbals become more pronounced:  e.g., collapsed chest, shoulders forward, respiration rapid and shallow, pupils dilated, voice pitched high, face tight.

You can project more confident body language, and you’ll feel more confident.  You’ll teach yourself to extinguish some of these anxiety flags.  People will react positively to the new, confident you. Pavlov’s conditioning is a powerful reinforcing agent. Over time, you won’t have to pretend to be confident.   You will be confident. 

2. FALSE -- An easy one. Vocal cues carry qualifying messages that support, tweak, or discount the words. Americans are pros at sarcasm.  Watch your voice inflection, rate of speech, volume, and tone. Be sure your vocal cues support your message – unless you’re telling a joke.

3. FALSE -- Nonverbal communication is continuous. It’s on-going. It never stops.

4. FALSE -- An easy answer, with complex levels of application. Cognitively, people know there are multiple interpretations.  Yet, people interpret nonverbals one way at an unconscious level and act on those feelings. 

Let’s imagine a wife asks her husband to accompany her to visit her mother, and in the next half-second his gaze shifts away and back, he sighs, and his mouth tightens. The wife reads his nonverbals, assumes her husband doesn’t want to go, and reacts before he can say anything.  She says, “Forget it. I’ll go without you.” Her tone is sharp enough to cut a diamond (vocal cue and hyperbole). 

Her nonverbals -- posture stiffening, eyes flashing, harsh vocal cues -- surprise her husband. He stares at her, his mouth open (confused) or closed tight (agitated).   She turns, grabs the keys, and leaves, punctuating her anger by slamming the door.  The husband stands there wondering what the heck happened. Her question, asking him to go with her, triggered a thought. He recalled the car had a vibration the last time he drove it and he wondered if the tires needed to be balanced. His split-second nonverbal responses – shifting gaze, a sigh, and his mouth tightening – reflected his body responding to his thoughts about the tires. 

WHOOPS! The wife thought his nonverbals communicated that he didn’t want to go with her to visit her mother.  She reacted with anger. He has no idea why she got angry and left. He probably thinks she’s PMS’y. ;-)))

Situations like that play out too frequently with couples, friends, coworkers. People misinterpret nuances of body language and take action.  Misreading the escalating stimulus/response patterns of nonverbals, builds conflict. Pausing, realizing that body language can be interpreted in a gazillion ways, and getting clarification, can result in fewer slammed doors and more smiles.

5.  TRUE – and so fun! When you’re in a restaurant, watch couples and friends who like each other.  They both lean forward seemingly at the same time.  One leads by a nanosecond. They may reach for their beverages and drink at the same time.  They mirror posture, gestures, facial expressions, voice patterns.  Their body language looks choreographed.

6.  TRUE-- This answer was covered in #5. :-)))

7.  FALSE – Facial expressions are key, but vocal cues, posture, movements, spatial relationships, all contribute to the nonverbal message.  Depending on the research, faces carry 30 to 50% of the nonverbal message.

8.  FALSE -- Faces are never blank. Lips twitch. Nostrils flare. Eyes narrow or widen almost imperceptibly.  Mouths barely open or barely tighten. Pupils dilate.  Tips of tongues show when people moisten lips.  To a kinesics specialist, these are all diagnostic indicators. To a writer, these are cues to write flicker-face emotions.
 
9.  TRUE – The lips do more. Watch people’s mouths. You’ll have more insight into their reactions.

10. TRUE – Self-Touch behaviors increase when people are anxious.  They touch their face (cheek, eyebrow, lips, nose, ear), or near their face (throat, jaw, back of neck, behind ear, hair), or hands and arms. 

Self-touch behaviors accelerate when anxiety is high. They are body language polygraphs. When people are in a job interview, when suspects are interrogated, when a guy proposes to his gal, self-touch behaviors significantly increase. The person who’s anxious may touch their face, throat, hand, or arm every 10 to 20 seconds, sometimes every couple of seconds, unaware of their self-touch behavior. 

HOW DID YOU SCORE? Did you make a 100? 90? 80?

Chime in. I’ll respond throughout the day and late this evening. Check back, I’ll respond. 

Body language is fascinating. For those of you who are writers, you get to monitor your body language when you’re pitching to agents and editors, interacting with booksellers, introducing a speaker, being on a panel, presenting a workshop, and doing a book signing.

PLUS – When you’re capturing nonverbal communication on the page, you get to explore the full range of body language, and challenge yourself to write it fresh.  Look at the power you have with body language. You can use nonverbals to complicate scenes and drive plot points. :-)))

Want to WIN a Lecture Packet?

Anyone who posts a comment has a chance to win one of my LECTURE PACKETS (a $20 value).

1. Empowering Characters' Emotions -- covers full range of body language

2. Deep Editing: The EDITS System, Rhetorical Devices, and More

3. Defeat Self-Defeating Behaviors

If you’re a reader, not a writer, my Defeat Self-Defeating Behaviors lectures apply to you too. ;-)))

Barbara, Thank you again.  When I meet you in November, I get to see your body language in action!

Margie, it has been a pleasure having you here with us today.  I'm expecting a lot of interaction (last time Margie visited there were 132 posts!!)  So stop back to see what's been said.

Bottom Line:   “I speak two languages, Body and English." ~ Mae West


Posted by Barbara Vey on February 12, 2008 | Comments (205)


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February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Gail Barrett commented:

Hi Margie! I got 90%, but then, I have taken most of your wonderful, wonderful classes:))) I loved your tire example. I wonder if there is a gender difference in the ability to read body language. Any studies on that?




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jeanne Stein commented:

Wow-- Margie-- You reminded me of things I sometimes forget in my writing. The body is as expressive as the face, isn't it?




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Barbara Vey commented:

Oops! Forgot to say that I scored an 80 and here I thought I had body language down to a science. I need to start paying more attention.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Terry Banker commented:

Margie--

How does Tom live with you? :)

Ter




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
CorrinaC commented:

Great post, Margie! I always find your lectures interesting and learn lots. I scored a 90. Which is funny, because I'm the worst person for conveying the wrong type of body language...




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
CorrinaC commented:

Great post, Margie! I always find your lectures interesting and learn lots. I scored a 90. Which is funny, because I'm the worst person for conveying the wrong type of body language...




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Gail -- There are gender differences. You know which way it swings. Females pick up body language on a conscious level more often than males.

Since you're a graduate of Empowering Characters' Emotions, I bet you write the full range of body language for your characters -- and you're probably more aware of the nuances of nonverbals too. :-)))

See you at the WRW Retreat in April!

Hugs.........Margie


Hugs............Margie


Hugs.............Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Cher commented:

Hi Margie :-)) I got them all right except #7. So that gave me a 99. Not bad. :-))

Have a super day,

Cher




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Jeanne -

You're so right. The body is as expressive as the face. Think Marilyn Monroe!

Hugs............Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Barbara -

An 80%? Not bad! I wonder how the males in your family would score!

Hugs........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Terry --

How does Tom live with me? You'd have to ask him!

Hugs..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Corrina --
Interesting. You scored a 90%, yet you say you're the worst person for conveying the wrong type of body language. I bet you tune in when it counts. ;-)))

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Cher - 90% is great! Number 7 is a tough one. I bet a lot of people miss it.

Thanks for stopping by!

Hugs..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jo Anne commented:

Yikes, Margie - I missed 3 of them. Guess I need to pay more attention to body language. So enjoyed Saturday's Houston workshop and I'll see you again in a couple of weeks.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Nancy commented:

I missed 4 of them. Don't know why I picked the wrong answers. I guess I need to review my notes from Margie's workshop. Great to see you on the blog, Margie.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Marilyn commented:

I scored 80%. I especially love #4 with the husband and wife scenario. I used to work in customer service where about 95% of my contact with people was by telephone. Email contact was just beginning to come about when I left that job. We were sent through a two-day workshop to help us convey things better via telephone (for example, keep a mirror at your desk and when the phone rings look at yourself and smile before you answer. Your voice will sound better and more of communication is in the perception of what you said than what you actually said. Did that make sense?) I hope I get the chance to take one of your workshops one day.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Jo Anne --

You may be like a lot of people, great at reading faces, but you may not be tuning in to some of the other nonverbal flags.

So fun to see you in my Deep Editing workshop in Houston last weekend. West Houston RWA -- such a dynamite group! Looking forward to seeing you in my ECE workshop in Shreveport in a couple of weeks!

Hugs..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Linda Barrett commented:

Hi Margie,
The Houston EDITS workshop was so great, I revised a chapter! And now this info - I'm having a wonderful week. Using body language is so-o important for a writer. Thanks for blogging today.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Linda Barrett commented:

Hi Margie,
The Houston EDITS workshop was so great, I revised a chapter! And now this info - I'm having a wonderful week. Using body language is so-o important for a writer. Thanks for blogging today.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Kimberly, AKA Problem Child commented:

I love stuff like this. I always thought I was a nerd...guess I'm not alone!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Gail Barrett commented:

Margie - I'm thrilled that you are coming to the WRW spring retreat. See you then!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
CJ Lyons commented:

Margie,
love the husband/wife example!!! Boy am I guilty of that--reading body language too fast and responding before they can interpret for me. Good reminder that I need to slow down and let others (ie. guys!) get a word in edgewise.

Why do men have a harder time reading body language than women? Wouldn't they develop these skills instinctively as part of survival--reading the intentions of strangers met while hunting and gathering and the like?

Great post!
CJ




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Valerie Everhart commented:

Wow..I can see where this would help deepen my writing. And the thing about the lips- I thought it always was the eyes that were more of a give-away. Thanks for the info!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Kim Lenox commented:

Hey Margie! I absolutely LOVED the Houston EDITS workshop on Saturday. Very concrete, and VERY applicable. Thank you so much for coming. This was an excellent post -- very interesting.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Kim Lenox commented:

Hey Margie! I absolutely LOVED the Houston EDITS workshop on Saturday. Very concrete, and VERY applicable. Thank you so much for coming. This was an excellent post -- very interesting.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Mary Ellen Carmody commented:

Margie - I scored 90%. I have always been interested in non-verbal communication. Also, I just finished reading a Jeffrey Deaver book where the main character is an expert in that.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Mary Ellen Carmody commented:

Margie - I scored 90%. I have always been interested in non-verbal communication. Also, I just finished reading a Jeffrey Deaver book where the main character is an expert in that.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Marilyn --
Glad you enjoyed the quiz. Me too!
Smiling right before you answer the phone does improve voice tones. :-)))

Maybe I'll see you in one of my on-line classes. I'm teaching Empowering Characters' Emotions on-line in March.

Thank you for chiming in!

Best.........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Lisa commented:

Margie I enjoyed your info on body language. It's always an interesting subject.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Marcia James commented:

Great quiz! I missed your recent workshop in Columbus, OH, and heard it was great! I look forward to taking one of your online courses.
-- Marcia James ;-)




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Lark commented:

Enjoyed meeting you last weekend. The workshop was great. As a writer body language is such a fascinating subject to me--thanks for a fun quiz.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Darlene commented:

Fantastic blog, Margie. There's a lot I don't know about body language. Do you have any resources for interpreting what smiles mean? Darlene




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Kathleen Bacus commented:

Hi Margie! I scored pretty well here--probably because we just finished going over non-verbal communication and body language in a communications class I'm taking. Great post!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Vicky Dreiling commented:

Margie, this was so helpful, I printed it out. I especially loved your example in #4; I chuckled over that one. Your workshop in Houston was fantastic!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Veronica Alderson commented:

WOW! This is a great quiz! Scored 100% I guessed on 4. Had to think about it and made a logical guess! I loved the scene! I have jumped the gun with a similar situation before! I could relate! LOL
Cheers, Veronica Alderson




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Rhonda S. commented:

Wow, that was amazing. I learned some new things!!

I did know about the mirroring, though...in fact, I try to consciously practice it with people sometimes. It really does help things feel more like you're connected!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jean Wise commented:

well I scored a dismal 80% and thought I knew better. You are so right on needing to always be mindful of non verbals. I am also a reporter for the local paper for feature articles and cover some board meetings. This has given me an opportunity to observe public officials non verbals and man do they need an update also. People watching is fun!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jean Wise commented:

well I scored a dismal 80% and thought I knew better. You are so right on needing to always be mindful of non verbals. I am also a reporter for the local paper for feature articles and cover some board meetings. This has given me an opportunity to observe public officials non verbals and man do they need an update also. People watching is fun!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Edie Ramer commented:

Margie, great quiz! I laughed all the way through number 5. You nailed the interaction between me and my husband.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Debbie G commented:

I loved the quiz, esp. the husband and wife example. So how does one go about getting better at reading other peoples body language?




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Mark David Gerson commented:

I scored 80. Maybe it's time to start going out in public with a paper bag over my head...<br><br>

Mark David Gerson<br><br>
www.markdavidgerson.com




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Katherine Ivy commented:

What a great little chunk of information. I didn't do too well on the quiz, but I definitely learned a lot. I've heard your name buzzing around all of the writing loops I'm on, Margie, and now I see why! I am so off to rewrite my first meet scene between the H/h, thanks for the inspiration!

-Kat




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Sarah Schroder commented:

I so enjoyed your workshop this weekend! My mind is still whirling!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Terri Thayer commented:

I scored 90% because I've taken Margie's classes. I think #7 was a ringer question, just to ruin my perfect score!

Good reminder to add these nonverbals to my work.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jess commented:

This is fascinating. My husband keeps his hands on or around his face constantly--so this mean he's anxious? Chronically anxious? Do I need to get him some help? :) We'll be watching TV and I'll look over and he's got both hands on his face. I'm going to read this post again. Now I'm worried.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jess commented:

This is fascinating. My husband keeps his hands on or around his face constantly--so this mean he's anxious? Chronically anxious? Do I need to get him some help? :) We'll be watching TV and I'll look over and he's got both hands on his face. I'm going to read this post again. Now I'm worried.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Carol commented:

Great post, Margie. I also missed # 7, so that gives me a 90. I see where Body Language is important in writing. Thanks, interesting reading.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie's Captain TOM commented:

Terry,

She makes me wear a special suit (picture a deep sea diving outfit, complete with brass helmet and thick gloves). When the suit comes off, the real fun begins.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Stacey Joy Netzel commented:

Margie--I got a 90, got #9 wrong. I hope to take your workshop Empowering Character Emotions this fall and am really looking forward to it! Sounds like it'll be great.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Melissa Ohnoutka commented:

Wow! Great quiz! It was wonderful to meet you Saturday. My head is still spinning with all the wonderful information from your workshop. I can't wait to use your editing techniques. Thanks!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margaret commented:

You mention interviewing a suspect. What are your thughts on torture, waterboading. What's the liklihood of interrogators getting honest information? Have you ever trained FBI or CSI agents?




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Juls commented:

Hi Margie:
I knew some of them, but not all. I absolutely loved the husband/wife scenerio. I do that all the time. Hope you're having fun today, and thanks for inviting us to join in.

Hope to see you soon,
Juls




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Amie Stuart commented:

<br>Hey Margie!!!

<br> I scored an 80--missed two. I love your classes and can't wait to meet you in May at Yellow Rose!

<br>

Amie

<br>www.amiestuart.com/blog




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jeff Shelby commented:

80. That's like a B-, right?:)




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
DeborahBrent commented:

I learned some new facts about body language. Thank you.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Chris commented:

Fascinating reading! Definitely a great way to add dimension to one's writing.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margaret Daley commented:

This was wonderful information. Thanks, Maggie. As a writer this will help me.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
T, Delaney commented:

Margie,
This is my first introduction to you, and I loved the wonderful and informative post. I scored 80%, probably due to my work in the legal field, and am now searching the web for more articles.
Thanks,
Teresa




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
SFLynda commented:

Wow! I only got 70% right and there I was thinking I'd ace the test :D Clearly I need to take the class or win or buy the Lecture Packet, LOL




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Cara Putman commented:

Hey Margie! Great topic. It's so important to get beyond one or two easy expressions in our writing. Thanks for the reminder and information on how important non-verbals are. I keep telling my husband that LOL




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
NE Jeanne commented:

So how long has it been since anyone willingly played cards with you?
And--if one uses this knowledge to control it and convey a desired impression, will it still work if the impress-ee would have scored a 40 on this quiz?




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Merilee Larson commented:

Hi Margie. It's been a few months since I took your ECE course in Nanaimo, so that must be why I got 90% :) Looking forward to your online Deep Editing in May. Thanks, Merilee.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Sally Jane Driscoll commented:

Hey, Margie! What good timing! Just yesterday, to jog my memory, I reprinted the posts from two of your courses I took on line, EDITS and Empowering Emotions. My notes on your self-defeating behaviors course are frayed and they need to be reprinted, too. I wanted to attend your lecture at the NOLA conference in Shreveport, but it's not possible. Thanks for all you do and I'm delighted to see you blogging here.
Sally Jane Driscoll
(To jog your memory: we met at Silicon Valley RWA---I was typing on that flat black keyboard in my lap and you bent over to inspect it while still talking---you never missed a word.)




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Pammer commented:

I only missed one. This is so interesting. I hope I can remember to watch my own body language and remember to put it in my writing as well.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jacs commented:

What an interesting blog! Thanks Barbara for having Margie here today. I got 90% on the quiz...like a few of the others I missed out on question #7 :)




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jacs commented:

What an interesting blog! Thanks Barbara for having Margie here today. I got 90% on the quiz...like a few of the others I missed out on question #7 :)




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
DonnaM commented:

Super information, Margie. What great insights for authors. I'm taping your blog on the wall next to my monitor. Do you have any books you might recommend for me to learn more about body language?
Donna M




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Sonja Goedde commented:

I scored 90%. I could have sworn eyes revealed more than the mouth. Thought that's why card players wore sun glasses. Interesting. So when are you going to publish your body language book? In the meantime, can you recommend any good ones. The few I bought weren't very good :(. And I need to add more variety of b.language to my characters. <waving hi from SVRWA in sunny CA>




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Sonja Goedde commented:

I scored 90%. I could have sworn eyes revealed more than the mouth. Thought that's why card players wore sun glasses. Interesting. So when are you going to publish your body language book? In the meantime, can you recommend any good ones. The few I bought weren't very good :(. And I need to add more variety of b.language to my characters. <waving hi from SVRWA in sunny CA>




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jeanne Barrack commented:

Well, I'm proud! I only got one wrong. Excellent information and as a writer, I'm happy to see I learned my lessons well!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Rita D. commented:

Thanks for great information! Scored 80%. Thanks for reminding this writer that the face only contributes up to 50% and that nonverbals never stop.Need to run out to a coffee shop and people watch. Bye.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Dana commented:


Oooh I had no idea about lips telling more than eyes!
Very interesting/awesome blog :) Thank you!!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Patti Rowell commented:

Hello, and thanks to both Barbara and Margie for this interesting information. I am looking forward to meeting you and being in your workshop, Margie, at the Written In The Stars conference in Shreveport at the end of this month. Patti Rowell, writing as Patricia Frances Rowell




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Julie commented:

This is fascinating information. Thanks Margie! I'll certainly be more careful of my characters' actions/reactions in my books!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
joysannoh commented:

Lousy score. I’m certain I semaphore anxiety to everyone, and that’s often misinterpreted. Thanks, Margie, for the info. And fabulous blog today, Barbara.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Hollly Wolfe commented:

Hi Margie;
What wonderful information! Even though I scored them all correctly (I'm a counselor and a good test taker).. it was fascinating to consider this information in the realm of my writing. I am going to rewrite some of the dialogue in my book right now. Body language rules the day! :-)




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Vivian commented:

I studied most of this way back when in college and then taught it in my speech and drama classes. Ish, still didn't get a 100%, but almost.

It's good to keep all this in mind when writing because we as authors can add more believability and depth to our characters when we use body language.

Vivian Gilbert Zabel




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Elysabeth Eldering commented:

I had taken public speaking in college recently and then a followup course (but it wasn't dealing with public speaking directly and I can't remember the course name) and I had a blast learning all the tells - by the time I finished the public speaking course I felt pretty confident about speaking in public but then again, I'm an outgoing person and like to talk - lol -

Great post - thanks for sharing - E :)




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
KELLY SCHAUB commented:

Pleased I got 100%! I tell everyone about your classes, Margie, and tout you on my editing website. You've helped me be a better writer and as a result of using some of your deep editing techniques I've become published. Learning more body language cues would be a huge help--something beyond "He nodded" "he shrugged" and "her face grew warm" LOL. I love your example of the misunderstanding via reading body language incorrectly.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Giovanna Lee commented:

Hello Barbara and Margie 70% - Timely reminder. Margie I have taken your on line classes over the years and learned heaps. I'm so looking forward to meeting you at our August New Zealand conference.Giovanna Lee




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
vegasbaby commented:

90%(Not bad) :) This was very interesting and alot of good info. Thanks Margie and Barbara.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Darcy Crowder commented:

Hi Margie

I had 90% -- #7 got me. <g> I loved the examples you used, especially the husband/wife. So true. Have a great summer and I'll see you at M&M!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Lisa commented:

I got 90%. Missed the one about a blank face. I know my face reads like a book, but I thought other people could control their facial expressions. :o)




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Lisa commented:

I got 90%. Missed the one about a blank face. I know my face reads like a book, but I thought other people could control their facial expressions. :o)




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Valerie K commented:

Very interesting...I will have to think about taking ECE! Just finished DSDB and am going through the information lecture by lecture with my coach to get those good habits into place. Thank you for all your sound information! Hope to run into you sometime in the real world.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Hilary C commented:

Loved your detailed scenario in #4, fascinating, and very useful. Thanks for sharing your experience.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Amy Shojai commented:

Very kewl column--I think a lot about nonverbal cat and dog communication, but who knew all that stuff with the humans?! Thanks Margie!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jaxine Daniels commented:

Margie,
Another great read from my favorite psychologist/writer/mentor/friend! I love what you said about lips. I was watching a movie just last night and the actor conveyed such emotion with his lips, starting to speak, then stopping. Isn't it fun when actors use all the tools available to them?

Have a great day, Margie.

Jax




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Beverley Bateman commented:

Hi Margie,

Loved the quiz. I always learn so much from your posts. I missed #3 about waiting a few seconds before showing their nonverbal response.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Linda Barrett --

Yay! You deep edited a chapter. I love hearing that from a successful author. I bet you had fun backloading. :-)))

Great to meet you last weekend. Thanks for dropping by Barbara's blog.

Hugs..............Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Kimberly --

I don't think of body language specialists as nerds. We're social.:-)))

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

CJ -- Some guys read body language well. Others don't speak the language. Maybe cave men were more about who carried the biggest club. Man to man, strength won. Women needed to find other tools. Tools they could use to outsmart the men. :-)))

See you in March!

Hugs.........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Valerie --

Writing the full range of body language, and writing it fresh, definitely takes your writing deeper. It's one of the tools I teach that helps writers add psychological power. They learn to write page-turners.

Thank you for dropping by Barbara's blog.

Best.........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Kim Lenox!

So fun to meet you in Houston. Glad you liked DEEP EDITING. Hope you'll be adding power with at least 15 of those 25 rhetorical devices you learned. ;-)))

Look forward to seeing you again.

Hugs..............Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Mary Ellen --

WOOHOO! So glad you read Jeffery Deaver's book, THE SLEEPING DOLL. Kathryn Dance, his main character, is a KINESICS specialist. His book is a fabulous read. ;-)))

Thanks for sharing!

Best...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Lisa - I'm glad you enjoyed reading about body language.
Drop by Barabara's blog again!

Best............Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Lisa - I'm glad you enjoyed reading about body language.
Drop by Barabara's blog again!

Best............Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Marcia James --

Hello! The Columbus group was so fun. COFW did a fabulous job coordinating my workshop weekend.
Sorry you didn't get to attend my Empowering Characters' Emotions workshop in Ohio last month. ECE is the course that covers how to write the full range of nonverbal communication. If it fits in your schedule, I'm teaching ECE on-line in MARCH. Or -- you could order the Lecture Packet. It's got over 250 pages of lectures . . . you'll learn body language. :-)))

Hope to see you on-line again.

Best............Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Lark -
Such a treat to meet you in Houston. Loved connecting with you both evenings. Great group of committed-to-learning writers. They worked hard. :-))) Glad you enjoyed Deep Editing. Have fun applying what you learned!

Hugs..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Darlene -

Smiles can carry a gazillion different messages. No material on interpreting them. The important piece for writers to do, is to give the reader more information about the smile. Don't write it trite. Write it fresh. Amplify the smile and write in a way that deepens character.

Thanks for asking about smiles!

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Kathleen Bacus --

I bet you're the Kathleen Bacus I met at the KOD Retreat in Omaha last October. :-))) Fun times! Glad you scored well on the body language test!

Thanks for chiming in!

Best...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Vicky D --

I enjoyed meeting you in Houston. Glad the blog gave you a knowing chuckle. ;-)))

Hope to see you again sometime!

Hugs...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello to PERFECT SCORE Veronica!

Ah -- #4 resonated with you. I bet you'll be paying more attention to your body language.

Thank you for sharing!

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Amanda commented:

I'm a reader, but I love your blog Barbara. This was such a cool quiz. I scored a 90 and like most, missed question 7. Looks like I'm in good company.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Rhonda --

Isn't mirroring fascinating? Some psychologists take it deeper - practicing PACING and LEADING. They JOIN (mirror) behavior of the client for awhile, then the psycholgist takes the lead and does their clinical thing. :-)))

You're right, mirroring is a strong joining technique.

Thank you for sharing!

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Jean W --

Sounds like you have fun observing body language in board meetings. I would too. ;-))) For writers, people watching is research!

Thank you for dropping by Barbara's blog. Drop by again!

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Judy Sabel Soifer commented:

Hi Margie,

I always wondered if it was true if two people were getting along do they tend to cross their legs toward each other? In the same vain if they aren't do they cross them away from one another?

Judy




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Edie --

Ah -- #4 was patterned after you and your husband! Hmm -- Are you going to have him take the Body Language Quiz?

Hugs..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Carol commented:

Hi Margie,

I've heard such wonderful things about your lecture packets! I'm in the Detroit area, and hope to see you when you visit this summer.

I got 80% right - don't know what that means, though. :) Very interesting post! Thanks for sharing!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Ginger Duran commented:

I am SOO happy to have found this blog today. It's always so nice to learn from Margie! I've taken her classes-she's the BEST!

Anyway, I received an 80%. I identified with Margie's comment about the mistaken action the Wife took. My significant other says I do that a lot. :) Perhaps with reason. :)))




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Debbie G ASKED: So how does one go about getting better at reading other peoples body language?

If you're a writer, take my Empowering Characters' Emotions course in MARCH (or order the Lecture Packet). I have over 250 pages of lectures for each course. ECE is power-packed with how to write (and read!) the full range of nonverbal communication, my EDITS System, and how to write fresh.

If you're not a writer, there are a few books on body language. I have not yet found one that takes body language beyond the basics.

I'm developing a DEEP EDITING POWER Workbook for writers. Stay tuned! :-)))

Thank you for chiming in today!

Best...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Mark --

Glad you're going with paper bags over your head, as opposed to plastic. ;-))

And -- 80% is good. Better than some of the females scored -- and exactly the same as another male scored (Jeff).

Thanks for chiming in.

Best.........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Lisa Tapp commented:

Hi Margie and Barbara. Your body language survey is a great tool to keep on hand. As a writer, it will remind me to use nonverbal "tells," especially in characters trying to avoid detection. Thanks.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Katherine Ivy -
Nice to e-meet you. Glad you learned something about body language today. AND -- keep in mind -- I have a loaded 250+ page on-line course (or Lecture Packet) that can teach you everything you need to know to write the full range of body language for your characters. :-)))

Feel free to e-mail me privately, Margie@MargieLawson.com, if you have questions or would like more information.

Thanks!

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Terri --

Great to see you again! Glad you're using what you learned in Empowering Characters' Emotions!

Hope to see you on-line again!

Hugs...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Jess --

Your husband frequently has both hands on his face while he watches TV. Hmm . . . could be his thinking-about-things position. Or -- more like a comfort thing. Sounds like his hands stay on his face for a minute or more. Doesn't sound like anxiety-triggered self-touch behavior.

You're fun! Maybe he'll take the Body Language Quiz. ;-)))

Thanks for chiming in!

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Carol -- Glad you enjoyed the blog!

Thanks for chiming in on Barbara's blog today!

Best......Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Stacey --

Hey - You don't have to wait until the fall to learn how to write body language. I'm offering ECE on-line in March. Plus, ECE is available all the time as a lecture packet. I hate for you to wait 7, 8, or 9 months to get this material!

E-mail me privately -- margie@margielawson.com -- and let me know where you live. I'm presenting ECE several places next fall.

Thanks! I look forward to hearing from you.

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Melissa --

I enjoyed talking to you in Houston on Saturday. Glad you sat on the front row. ;-)))

I bet you'll do a great job adding psychological power to your writing.

I hope to see you again sometime!

Hugs..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Anne commented:

Margie,

Greetings from CA!
Thanks for this quiz -- shows me how much I need to learn about non-verbal communication. I guess that's why they had to invent emoticons for emails and text messaging. :-)

Anne Lum, SV-RWA,
The one who flunked defeating self-defeating behaviors (through no fault of the instructor, of course!) :-D




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Margaret --

I'm not a specialist in torture, nor do I train FMI or CSI agents. Sorry I can't help you out in those areas.

I teach writers how to write the full range of body language, how to write fresh, how to add depth with 25 rhetorical devices, how to deep edit to speak to the reader's unconscious, how to write page turners. That's me. :-)))

Thanks for chiming in!

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hey Juls -- Thanks for dropping by! Glad you enjoyed the blog. ;-)))

Hugs...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Amie -- Thanks. Glad you enjoyed my on-line courses. I'm looking forward to meeting you too! See you in Fort Worth in May. ;-))

Hugs..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Dianne Gerber commented:

I learn a lot from this quiz. Scored 90%. The lips threw me. I've already signed up for your empowering emotions course in March and I'm really looking forward to it. Are you schedule to speak in the NE anytime this year? I'd love to meet you.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

HELLO EVERYONE!

I'd like to encourage you all to have fun with Barbara Vey's blog.

MONDAYS--are set up for AUTHORS to share their accomplishments: e.g., the first time they made a bestseller list, things they're doing for charity, awards won, milestones reached. Barbara calls it "This, that, and the other thing."

Take advantage of MONDAYS. Strut your stuff!

If you're hesitant to post, start off with this piece:

BECAUSE MARGIE LAWSON ENCOURAGED ME TO SHARE . . .

I'm serious. Post that line, then share your bragging point! Blame me. ;-)))

TUESDAYS and THURSDAYS are Barbara-choice days. Always interesting!

WEDNESDAYS--are book blurbs and comments. Great stuff!

YOUR TURN FRIDAYS--Barbara shares what she's read and ENCOURAGES you all to comment on what you've read. It's a chance to promote your book, your friend's book, chat, connect, and have fun!

Barbara's blog is a cozy place to chat about anything related to books. I feel at home here. :-)))

Feel free to add a link to Barbara's blog from your web site/blogs/myspace pages. Thanks!

This is my second time to be Barbara's guest -- and I always enjoy her e-hospitality. :-)))

I'm part way through responding to everyone. I will respond to several more comments now -- then go to Critique Group. It would be self-defeating for me to skip critique. ;-)))

I'll be back responding to posts later tonight. I'm in Denver, Mountain Time. My later may be LATE NIGHT for you.

I'll post the WINNER about 10PM Mountain Time. Barbara will post it on her blog tomorrow morning too.

Thanks for all your comments. I appreciate you all for taking the time respond.

If you have questions about my on-line editing courses for March and May, or any questions, please e-mail me privately: margie@margielawson.com.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Best..........Margie
www.MargieLawson.com




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Jeff --

B- ? Your characters are better at reading body language than you are. :-)))

Hugs..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Deborah B --

YAY! You learned something about body language today. Excellent!

Thanks for chiming in.

Best.........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jody Allen commented:

I got a 90%, very interesting. I used work with a young teenager who was blind. She had lot of difficulty fitting in with her peers because of her behavior: she was loud when she talked, interrupted other talkers and invaded peoples space. It used to try the other kids crazy until we explained to them that with her being blind she wasn't getting any of the visual clue of body language that they did that governed, even subconsciously, their interactions with each other. She was loud because she didn't see the nonverbal reaction from others which we all learn to read to fit in. I'll have to see how the characters in my current read reacts to nonverbal clues. Very interesting.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Chris --

You betcha! It's a boost-yourself-onto-a-bestseller list way to deepen your writing. :-)))

Thanks!

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Margaret D --

Writing body language well is a must for writers. Glad you enjoyed the tip of the body language iceberg. :-))

Thanks for dropping by!

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

T. Delaney --

Great! I'm glad you visited the blog today. Keep in mind -- I have editing courses (and Lecture Packets) for writers. :-)))

Thanks!

Best........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

SF Lynda --

Thanks for letting me know you learned something from the blog. Excellent!

Please feel free to e-mail me if you have any questions: margie@margielawson.com

Thanks!

Best..........Margie
www.MargieLawson.com




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Evelyn Wolgin commented:

Margie,
Great blog. I need to go back and change a few things my hero (cop) looks for.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margay commented:

This has got to be one of the most fascinating aspects of humanity - especially considering that it's almost impossible to control it. Even in trying to control our body language, don't we then reveal something of ourselves?




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Lynn commented:

Margie, I scored a 90. The lip one got me. In my job body language is THE most important cue to how people are really feeling, especially political people that say one thing but mean another...

Great info. I look forward to meeting you in May when you come to Ft. Worth (I'm in the Yellow Rose, too.)




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Karen K commented:

Fascinating stuff, Margie. Reminds me so much of that old song that says "Your lips say no but your eyes say yes." LOL.You've made it so much fun to pick up on all the little nuances people give away without even realizing it. Thanks for another outstanding guest blog.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
gin commented:

Hi Margie,
I missed two...thought I would miss more as I am not the most observant at times. You always have such facinating info to share.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
gin commented:

Hi Margie,
I missed two...thought I would miss more as I am not the most observant at times. You always have such facinating info to share.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Jeanne (The Duchesse) commented:

Hi Margie! *Waving Wildy* Dropping in from the Bandit Lair to say hi and take the quiz. I scored a 90% because I'd heard an FBI speaker say the eyes "spoke" more than the lips. Drat! Great quiz. You don't have to put me in the drawing - but anyone else, you'll LOVE Margie's workshop workbooks. They ROCK! And can't wait to see you in April at WRW!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
HelenSS commented:

I loved this. Very informative. I find it difficult to convey the body language in writing and would love any resources for that. I wonder whether there are cultural differences in body language and where I could learn about this. Thank you.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Teresa D'Amario commented:

Hi Margie, you probably don't remember me. You and I chatted more than a year ago when I bought your wonderful packet! I dont' remember seeing the nonverbals yet though! I hope i"m not too late!




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Cara --

Hello! Great to see you here. It's amazing how writing fresh body language can add so much depth to your writing.

Thank you for dropping by Barbara's blog!

Chat soon...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello NE Jeanne --

You asked: If one uses this knowledge to control it and convey a desired impression, will it still work if the impress-ee would have scored a 40 on this quiz?

The person you are trying to impact doesn't have to be good at reading nonverbals. They'll just react to your full message.

Look at actors. We're swayed by their body language. We buy it -- even when we know they're acting. It's part of the full communication package. ;-)))

It's a fascinating subject.

Thanks for sharing.

Best............Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Merrilee!

I had such fun with you all in Nanaimo! I remember both of your names. :-)))

Yay! I'll see you in Deep Editing class on-line in May. You're going to love it!

So glad you stopped by.

Hugs..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Sally Jane Driscoll!

I remember you! WOW! You just reprinted all my lectures from two courses? I'm impressed! That's 450 - 500 pages! You are definitely commited to taking your writing to a higher level!

I hope you're doing well. Sorry you can't make Shreveport. Maybe I'll see you when I present in North San Francisco (Black Diamond RWA) in January, 2009. That's planning ahead!

Stay in touch.

Hugs..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Pammer --

I hope you add the full range of body language to your writing too. By now, you know that I cover this topic in-depth in Empowering Characters' Emotions -- in an on-line course in March -- and that the Lecture Packet for ECE can be ordered anytime.

Please e-mail me if you have questions: margie@margielawson.com.

Thanks! And -- I appreciate you dropping by Barbara's blog today.

Best...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Jacs --

I thank Barbara for inviting me to blog too!

Glad you chimed in. :-))

Best...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Donna M --

Hello! I'm guessing that you haven't taken my Empowering Characters' Emotions course. If you've read some of my responses today - you know a bit about it. If you have questions -- please feel free to e-mail me. Margie@MargieLawson.com

I'm not aware of any truly good books on body language. The ones I've seen are fairly basic. My ECE course has 250 pages of lectures -- and I cover writing the full range of nonverbal communication.

I'm developing a book for writers that will cover it too: Deep Editing Power. :-)))

Thanks for letting me know you enjoyed what you learned from the blog. Tons more in the course!

Best............Margie
www.MargieLawson.com




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Everyone!-------TWO WINNERS!-------

With so many people posting today -- I decided to draw two names! Two people will win a lecture packet from me.

>>>>>>>>>>>THE WINNERS ARE >>>>>>>>>>>>

1. JESS (Who had the husband who kept his hands on his face!)

2. AMY SHOJAI (Who knows about nonverbal cat and dog communication!)

CONGRATULATIONS TO JESS AND AMY!

Please e-mail me privately -- Margie@MargieLawson.com -- and I'll send you a Lecture Packet!

I will continue to respond to e-mails later tonight (after I drive home).

Thanks everyone.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Marilyn commented:

I'm up late working on a deadline and kept checking to see if just maybe my name was picked. No such luck, but congrats to the winners! And thanks, Margie, for all the great info.




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Sonja --

The eyes do reveal emotion and tells. Breaking eye contact is a huge tell. Yet, the lips and mouth can convey more.

Thanks for asking about my book. It's not ready yet. I haven't found any good books on body language.

I cover a lot of body language in my Empowering Characters' Emotions course. My live courses touch on some of the nonverbal communication, but there's no time to develop each area like I do in the lectures.

Great to see you again! Thank you for stopping by today.

Best...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Jeanne B --

Good job! 90%

Glad you enjoyed this quick pass on body language. I think you've taken ECE on-line -- but I could be recalling a different Jeanne B. ;-)))

Thank you for chiming in!

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Rita D --

Good to see you again. You're so fun! Glad you got some tips from the blog. :-)))

Hugs...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Dana --

So fun to see you here! Yep, the lips tell more than eyes. Interpreting body language is a science. :-)))

Thanks for stopping by.

Hugs............Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Patti --

Yay! I get to meet you at the Written in the Stars conference in Shreveport in just a couple of weeks. Glad you liked the blog!

See you soon. ;-)))

Best..........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Julie --

It is fascinating -- especially when you get into analyzing each area of nonverbal communication in-depth. In my ECE course (and Lecture Packet), I have one lecture focused on paralanguage (vocal cues). We explore a variety of ways to qualify and expand descriptions of vocal cues, as well as how to spot troublesome patterns. Abd that's just one part of body language. :-)))

Thank you for posting a comment.

Best...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Joysannoh --

Hey -- I'm sure there are lots of people who didn't post a comment who got scores much lower than expected. I appreciate you for posting to the blog.

You are probably correct -- that people pick up your nonverbals when you're anxious, yet they may misinterpret them.

Good insight. Glad you liked the blog. :-))

Best...........Margie






February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Holly W -- KUDOS TO YOU on your PERFECT SCORE!

Glad you're going to rewrite a scene and add more nonverbal communication. Very smart.

AND -- remember -- I teach writers how to use the full range of nonverbal communication in my Empowering Characters' Emotions course. :-)))

Thank you for chiming in.

Best..........Margie

Hi Margie; What wonderful information! Even though I scored them all correctly (I'm a counselor and a good test taker).. it was fascinating to consider this information in the realm of my writing. I am going to rewrite some of the dialogue in my book right now. Body language rules the day! :-)





February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Vivian --

You are so right. Writers can add more believability and depth to their characters when they use body language. I'd take it deeper, and say when they write the full range of nonverbal communication -- and when they write it fresh.

That's why I developed my Empowering Characters' Emotions course. Writers need to learn this material!

Thanks for sharing. I appreciate you.

Best...........Margie




February 12, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Everyone!

Thank you again for posting today. I enjoyed hearing from you.

It's late. I'll respond to the rest of the comments on Wednesday.

Best..........Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
babs commented:

Wow! I should have known this. I never give my husband time to respond and nearly always jump to conclusions what he's thinking. Because he's got ADD, tho, he could really be thinking any one of a NUMBER of things. HAHA. bmountjoy@alltel.net




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Elysabeth --

Ah -- You know TELLS. No one wants to play cards with you either. :-)))

Thanks for dropping by Barbara's blog.
See you another time!

Best..........Margie

I had taken public speaking in college recently and then a followup course (but it wasn't dealing with public speaking directly and I can't remember the course name) and I had a blast learning all the tells - by the time I finished the public speaking course I felt pretty confident about speaking in public but then again, I'm an outgoing person and like to talk - lol - Great post - thanks for sharing - E :)





February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

HELLO KELLY SCHAUB!

WOOHOO! You Deep Edited your way to publication. I'm so happy for you! Glad my DEEP EDITING techniques made for a smooth and powerful read.

THANK YOU for recommending my on-line courses on your web site. I'll drop by and learn about your book! ;-)))

Great body language score-- 100%!

Looking forward to hearing from you again.

Hugs...........Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Giovanna Lee --

I remember you! Great to see you here--and even better to know I'll get to meet you in New Zealand in August! Can't wait to meet everyone face-to-face and hug-to-hug. ;-)))

Thanks for popping on Barbara's blog!

Hugs.............Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

HELLO VEGASBABY!

Good score, 90%. Glad you got some good info from the blog. I look forward to seeing you on-line again!

Best...........Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hey Darcy!

Ah -- another victim of #7. You would have had a perfect score.

Thank you for inviting me to present at Moonlight & Magnolia's Conference. Looking forward to meeting you in October!

Hugs...........Margie

Hi Margie I had 90% -- #7 got me. I loved the examples you used, especially the husband/wife. So true. Have a great summer and I'll see you at M&M!




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Lisa --
It's the nuances that keep a face from being blank. You still made an A!

THANK YOU for stopping by Barbara's blog. Hope to see you on-line again sometime.

Best............Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

HELLO VALERIE -- A DEFEAT SELF-DEFEATING BEHAVIORS GRADUATE! You'd love ECE -- and I'm teaching it on-line in March.
E-mail me privately and I'll share my recently updated presentation schedule. Maybe I'm presenting in your part of the world. ;-)))

THANK YOU for visiting Barbara's blog!

Hugs..........Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hilary -

Hello! Nice to e-meet you. Since you loved the details in #4, you'd love my ECE course (or Lecture Packet). Over 250 pages of lectures - packed with teaching and examples. ;-)))

Thank you for chiming in.

Best..........Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Amy -- Our cat and dog nonverbal communication specialist. YOU WERE ONE OF OUR WINNERS! I look forward to hearing from you. ;-))

Hugs............Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Jax -- LIPS are amazing indicators! Great to see you again. :-)))
Hugs............Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Beverley - HELLO! Wow---You got the hard questions right and missed only one. Good for you! Glad you liked the quiz. Thanks for chiming in!

Hugs............Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Amanda -- Always great to hear from a reader. Glad you enjoyed the quiz!

Best.........Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Judy SS -- Regarding leg crossing and friends -- It's more likely that friends would mimic each other's posture, including crossed legs. Great to see you here!

Hugs...........Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Carol -- YAY! I'll get to meet you when I present in Detroit in May. I'm presenting Defeat Self-Defeating Behaviors in Detroit. If you're interested in learning how to write the full range of nonverbal communication, that material is in Empowering Characters' Emotions----which I'm teaching on-line in March and is always available as a Lecture Packet. Please e-mail me if you have any questions: margie@margielawson.com.

Thanks! See you in May!

Best............Margie

Hi Margie, I've heard such wonderful things about your lecture packets! I'm in the Detroit area, and hope to see you when you visit this summer. I got 80% right - don't know what that means, though. :) Very interesting post! Thanks for sharing!




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

HELLO GINGER D! Always great to see you. Thanks for your kind words. ;-)))
Hope to see you on-line again!

Hugs............Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

HELLO LISA TAPP!

Ah--you write suspense. You know about TELLS, and you use them to compliccate your plot. Excellent!

THANK YOU for sharing!

Hugs...........Margie

Hi Margie and Barbara. Your body language survey is a great tool to keep on hand. As a writer, it will remind me to use nonverbal "tells," especially in characters trying to avoid detection. Thanks.




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hey Anne! I know you! I had the best time with all of the Silicon Valley RWA members. I loved meeting you all when I presented there last year. Too fun!

I cover nonverbal communication in-depth in my LECTURES in Empowering Characters' Emotions. :-)))

Thanks for stopping by and sharing your humor and your smile!

Please e-mail me if you have any questions: margie@margielawson.com.

Hugs...........Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello to Dianne Gerber!

YAY! I'll see you on-line in ECE in March.

I'm presenting ECE in a full-day master class in SYRACUSE the last weekend in March. Is that close enough? ;-)))

If you e-mail me, margie@margielawson.com, I'll send you my recently updated presentation schedule.

Looking forward to seeing you in class!

Best.........Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

HELLO Jody Allen - I don't beleive we've met on-line before. Thank you for chiming in. GREAT STORY about the blind teen. So true. IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU'D LIKE TO LEARN MORE ABOUT NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION.

If you've read any of my responses on this blog -- you know I'm teaching EMPOWERING CHARACTERS' EMOTIONS on-line in March. I teach writers how to write the full range of nonverbal communication. If you'd like to read a course description, click on LECTURE PACKETS on my web site. Thanks!

Best...........Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello Evelyn Wolgin -- I don't think I've seen you in any of my on-line courses either. What I just told JODY, in the comment above, applies here too. :-)))

If you have questions about ECE, feel free to e-mail me: margie@margielawson.com

THANK YOU!

Best..........Margie







February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Margay -- LOVED YOUR COMMENT! HERE IT IS. I'LL RESPOND BELOW:

This has got to be one of the most fascinating aspects of humanity - especially considering that it's almost impossible to control it. Even in trying to control our body language, don't we then reveal something of ourselves?

WE CAN CONTROL SOME OF OUR NONVERBALS, but not the tells. When you ask -- don't we reveal something of ourselves? -- I'm not sure what you mean. The observer won't be aware that we're altering our response sets, if we're good at it. ;-)))

Thank you for chiming in. I can tell you love analyzing body language!

I look forward to seeing you on-line again.

Best.........Margie





February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

HELLO LYNN FROM YELLOW ROSE RWA! YAY! I get to meet you in May!

Ah ----- You tune in to incongruent verbals and nonverbals. So intriguing!

THANK YOU for chiming in!

Best............Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello to my friend KAREN K! Thanks for dropping by! You're good at writing nuanced body language. :-)))

Hope to see you again, in person, sometime!

Hugs...........Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Gin -- Thank you! I enjoy sharing blogs that teach reader's something fun. ;-)))

THANK YOU for popping on Barbara's blog.

Hugs.............Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

HUGS TO JEANNE A(The Duchesse) --

I'll get to see you in April. Yay!

Hmm-----The FBI speaker must have pulled his data from different research. EYES tell a lot, but LIPS tell more.

For a HIGH ACHIEVER like you, getting a 90% hit hard. ;-))))

I'm excited about presenting at the Washington Romance Writers Retreat again. We'll have the best time!

Hugs.............Margie

Hi Margie! *Waving Wildy* Dropping in from the Bandit Lair to say hi and take the quiz. I scored a 90% because I'd heard an FBI speaker say the eyes "spoke" more than the lips. Drat! Great quiz. You don't have to put me in the drawing - but anyone else, you'll LOVE Margie's workshop workbooks. They ROCK! And can't wait to see you in April at WRW!




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Helen SS- You asked the right person the right questions! You've probably read a few of my responses to others -- and you may already know that I teach writers how to write the full range of nonverbal communication. My EMPOWERING CHARACTERS' EMOTIONS material----in the on-line course I teach in MARCH as well as in my LECTURE PACKETS-----is loaded with graduate level content and examples. Over 250 pages of lectures. Regarding your question about CULTURAL DIFFERENCES IN BODY LANGUAGE -- there is little in print. I'm aware of one good book -- and I can't recall the author's name. If you e-mail me, I'll look it up in my lectures and share author and title. margie@margielawson.com

TO READ MORE ABOUT MY ECE COURSE, please go to my web site and click on LECTURE PACKETS. www.MargieLawson.com

THANK YOU!

I look forward to hearing from you.

Best...........Margie

HelenSS commented:

I loved this. Very informative. I find it difficult to convey the body language in writing and would love any resources for that. I wonder whether there are cultural differences in body language and where I could learn about this. Thank you.






February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

HELLO --- Teresa D'Amario --

I remember your name. ;-)))

I cover nonverbal communication and my EDITS System in ECE. It's a lot of material in those 230+ pages! ----- FLIP BACK THROUGH YOUR ECE LECTURES -- You'll find the following topics::::::CAPTURING NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION ON THE PAGE-----THE DICTIONARY OF NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION-----LIP BEHAVIOR-----SELF-TOUCH BEHAVIOR-----EYE BEHAVIOR-----FULL FACIAL EXPRESSIONS-----BEYOND A SMILE------PARALANGUAGE-----LOVE SIGNALS-----MIRRORING-----CARRYING A NONVERBAL IMAGE FORWARD-----IDEOMOTORIC SHIFTS-----MORE FULL BODY KINESICS-----PROJECTING EMOTION FOR A NON POV CHARACTER-----THE POWER OF NUANCES-----CHRONEMICS-----HAPTICS-----PROXEMICS-----CROSS-CULTURAL COMMUNICATION-----GENDER DIFFERENCES IN NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION..........................................WHEW! We dig deep into nonverbal communication!

I hope you didn't mind that I put these topics in your e-mail. I had the list handy-----and thought it might jog your memory, as well as let others know the topics. THANK YOU!

SORRY YOU WEREN'T THE WINNER THIS TIME!

READ MY LAST POST TO THE BLOG-----and you'll see a few more places where you'll have an opportunity to win a Lecture Packet from me. ;-)))

THANKS AGAIN. Hugs...........Margie














February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello BABS!

Hey----Lots of couples are victims of nonverbal miscommunications! Have your husband take the Body Language QUIZ. I bet it would generate an interesting discussion. :-)))

THANK YOU for chiming in. Read my last comment to the blog if you're interested in another chance to win a Lecture Packet from me!

Best...........Margie




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Judy Sabel Soifer commented:

Margie,

If I forgot to tell you, I had a wonderful time in San Francisco meeting you. Regarding my question about leg crossing: If the couple are lovers, and are mad at each other, would they sit on a couch in front of a another person with their legs crossed away from each other? Is that a nonverbal cue that they are angry with one another?

Hugs, Judy ;)




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Marilyn----Too bad your name wasn't drawn. YET -- YOU HAVE MORE CHANCES TO WIN! Read my next post. ;-)))





February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

HELLO EVERYONE-----

Several people have e-mailed me asking where I'm GUEST BLOGGING next. Here are LINKS and DATES for February. *********REMEMBER*********WHEN I GUEST BLOG----I ALWAYS HAVE A DRAWING FOR LECTURE PACKETS. :-)))

---------------FRIDAY, FEB. 15th: FOG CITY DIVAS, www.fogcitydivas.com---------------FEB 11th through FEB 18th, MURDER IN THE GROVE, myspace.com/murderinthegrove---------------SATURDAY,FEB. 16th, Oklahoma Writers Federation, WebWritingWonders.wordpress.com---------------
FRIDAY, FEB 22, WRITER...INTERRUPTED, www.writerinterrupted.com---------------

A warm THANK YOU to you all for having fun with the quiz (and learning!) and to BARBARA VEY for inviting me to guest blog for her again.

Watch your body language!

Best..............Margie
www.MargieLawson.com




February 13, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Carolyn commented:

Loved your Powering Character Emotions class and appearance in Dallas.




February 15, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
John D. commented:

I'm one of Barb's brothers, and I scored at 80%. Is that good or bad?




February 15, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
John D. commented:

I'm one of Barb's brothers, and I scored at 80%. Is that good or bad?




February 15, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Barbara Vey commented:

OMG, one of my 4 brothers posted a comment. I'm printing it and putting it in my BHB scrapbook. Thanks John, I'm thrilled you're reading something nonsport related. :)<br><br> I'd love to have Margie evaluate your body language.




February 15, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Ann roth commented:

This is great stuff!

Thanks for sharing.

Ann Roth
www.annroth.net
Seattle, WA




February 15, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Carolyn --

I had a fabulous time presenting in Dallas! Look forward to seeing you again sometime. Maybe in Deep Editing? :-)))

Hugs............Margie




February 15, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Margie Lawson commented:

Hello John D, one of Barbara's brothers -

THANK YOU for stopping by B's blog.

An 80%? Not bad. Especially for a guy. :-)))

On a serious note, it is a good score. Cognitively you GET body language. I'll have to ask Barbara if you tune in to the nuances of body language in real life.

Maybe you can entice other siblings to take the body language quiz!

Best..........Margie




February 15, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Barbara Vey commented:

Margie, thanks again for coming back and answering all the comments. It's always fascinating to have you here and there is always lively discussion. Can't wait to hear what your next topic will be.




February 21, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
Delia Latham commented:

What an interesting post! I scored a 90, though I don't know how I knew those things. :)




March 14, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
LDawley commented:

I scored 90 but have a question about the one I missed #6 what if someone reads the body language correctly but wants to believe the words instead?K




August 30, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
hehe commented:

hehe hehe




August 30, 2008
In response to: Body Language 101
hehe commented:

hehe hehe




June 13, 2009
In response to: Body Language 101
JaneRadriges commented:

I really like your post. Does it copyright protected?





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