Congrats—You’re Having a Teen: Strengthen Your Family and Raise a Good Person

Pediatrician Ginsburg challenges the notion that parenting an adolescent is something to survive rather than savor in this can-do guide to building a relationship with one’s teen. His “pro-development” approach focuses on recognizing a child’s inherent goodness and teaching them to identify their own personal strengths. Ginsburg urges parents to respect the developmental changes of adolescence by adopting a co-regulating “cold communication” style that calms feelings without squashing them (and that avoids anger or condescension); listening in a way that encourages teens to share; recognizing a kid’s ability to learn rather than dismissing them as irrational and impulsive; and guiding them gently by being a reliable “lighthouse parent.” Ginsburg provides an evidence-based understanding of adolescent development, suggests a general parenting frameworks rather than strict dos and don’ts, and establishes a model in which parents make decisions based on what they feel their teen will need to thrive at age 35. There’s a lot of information, but straightforward takeaways and accessible writing keep things in reach. This goes a long way in draining the dread from adolescence. (Oct.)