cover image Unreliable Narrator: Me, Myself, and Impostor Syndrome

Unreliable Narrator: Me, Myself, and Impostor Syndrome

Aparna Nancherla. Viking, $28 (304p) ISBN 978-1-984879-80-6

Comedian Nancherla debuts with an intimate essay collection reflecting on the mental health challenges she’s navigated while building a career in comedy. In “Now That I Have You Here,” Nancherla recalls feeling insecure trying to break into the white male comedy world as an Indian American woman even after getting hired as a writer for the late-night show Totally Biased W. Kamau Bell, and she suggests that impostor syndrome in marginalized groups is the result of systemic biases “meant to engender uncertainty and lack of confidence in those who didn’t fit the perceived status quo.” Humor leavens the sometimes heavy subject matter, as when Nancherla describes in “Being Well” what she feels during a depressive episode: “The question ‘Why am I such a waste of life?’ suddenly becomes my PhD dissertation, in need of endless defense.” Elsewhere, she discusses battling anorexia, undergoing cosmetic procedures to change “her sleepy eyelid and gummy underbite,” and her “love-hate relationship” with performing standup. Not every piece works; in “The Agreeability Industrial Complex,” Nancherla juxtaposes feeling compelled to say yes to professional opportunities with her lack of interest in sex, but doesn’t quite tease out the connections between the two. Nonetheless, the sardonic humor and candid meditations on mental health resonate. It’s a surprisingly funny take on longing to feel comfortable in one’s own skin. (Sept.)