cover image The Collapse of Parenting: How We Hurt Our Kids When We Treat Them like Grown-Ups

The Collapse of Parenting: How We Hurt Our Kids When We Treat Them like Grown-Ups

Leonard Sax. Basic, $26.99 (304p) ISBN 978-0-465-04897-7

Sax (Why Gender Matters), a physician and psychologist, positions this unpersuasive treatise firmly in an earlier generation’s mores, lamenting the “culture of disrespect” and “massive transfer of authority from parents to kids.” Haranguing parents to “do your job” and enforce decisions that may upset their children or make them unpopular with peers, he maintains that being both “strict and loving” is not only possible, but essential. Among other dire observations, Sax states that poor fitness and obesity among children have been exacerbated by allowing them too much choice, and that research biased in favor of ADHD diagnoses has enabled the “medicalization of misbehavior.” As remedial measures, he insists parents demand self-control, emphasize humility above self-esteem, teach kids to prize literature over video games, and make family-fun time obligatory so kids will look to their parents for connection and behavioral guidance before their same-age companions. Although this is positioned as a parenting book, Sax offers more old-school philosophy than practical guidance. He is likely to find supporters among frustrated grandparents seeing their kids failing life’s challenges, but his aggressively judgmental style and throwback values are unlikely to convert anyone actually in the midst of parenting children and teens in the 21st century. (Dec.)