cover image Family Secrets

Family Secrets

John E. Bradshaw. Bantam Books, $23.95 (297pp) ISBN 978-0-553-09591-3

Bradshaw (Homecoming) takes us on a revealing and sometimes frightening tour of the family's mysterious power over us and shows how we are influenced by its ``toxic secrets,'' which run the gamut from ``normal'' problems, such as marital discord and emotional repression, to more damaging experiences, such as drug addiction and sexual abuse. Using the story of The Wizard of Oz as an analogy, Bradshaw explains why we must ``leave home to find home.'' He then takes us on a journey through the ``haunted forest'' and shows, step by step, how to reimagine our families, draw family maps using a tool called a genogram to chart key relationships, and discover the dark secrets of our parents and ancestors-to help us understand what made our parents act as they did. Finally, we can ``get back to Kansas'' by finding and freeing ourselves from our own dark secrets while remaining connected to the family. An appendix discusses the paradoxical nature of memory. Important reading for anyone who has children or grew up with parents. Illustrations. Simultaneous release from BDD Audio. (May)