cover image Expecting: One Man's Uncensored Memoir of Pregnancy

Expecting: One Man's Uncensored Memoir of Pregnancy

Gordon Churchwell. HarperCollins, $24 (304pp) ISBN 978-0-06-039345-8

With this lively memoir, Churchwell presents two books in one (twins, if you like): a funny, honest account of a regular guy's response to his wife's first pregnancy and a serious investigation of this ""weird juncture"" in the history of the family, when some men are trying to find ways to participate more directly in child-rearing. A typical ""expectant zombie-father,"" Churchwell gestates into a man who asks challenging questions about why fathers are the ""forgotten parent."" He finds that ""the typical American birthing experience for most of the 20th century is nothing to brag about"" and that pregnancy, experienced as a crisis by so many men, can be ""ground zero for many relationship problems."" His inquiry into couvade (male ""pregnancy"") leads him to suggest that this crisis arises because men have ""disappeared from the story of the family"" and are not taken seriously as participants in a pregnancy. If they are not ""invited early on into the process, is it any wonder that many men find it difficult to step into the sacred circle of parenting later on?"" he asks. Myths and rituals that once helped us cope with what we could not control have been replaced by science, our ""sole storyteller."" One of this memoir's strengths is that Churchwell uses science to tell the story of ""paternal response,"" a psychological complement to the biological changes experienced by pregnant women that might enable both partners to ""transcend the gender boundaries that confine pregnancy and parenting roles."" Agent, Elaine Markson. 5-city author tour; 25-city radio tour. (June)