cover image I Want My Epidural Back: Adventures in Mediocre Parenting

I Want My Epidural Back: Adventures in Mediocre Parenting

Karen Alpert. Morrow, $19.99 (327p) ISBN 978-0-06-242708-3

New York Times–bestselling author Alpert (I Love My Little A-holes; the Baby Sideburns parenting blog) continues her comic routine on the indignities of motherhood with this witty collection of anecdotes and reflections on parenting. This hilarious memoir of “mediocre” parenting in the 21st century covers everything from bribing kids with screen time to attempting crafts seen on Pinterest. Alpert affectionately refers to her two children, Zoey and Holden, as “douchenuggets.” She upends helicopter parenting in favor of a more realistic “half-assed” multitasking. Acknowledging the less glamorous side of parenting, she comically writes about the trials of potty training and planning birthday parties for six-year-olds at a “bounce house.” With titles like “And for Dinner I Gave My Kids an Eating Disorder,” and “Bedtime Is for Succcckers” she delightfully chronicles life as a “kickass mediocre parent.” She also composes lists on such topics as “Shit I do that I know I shouldn’t do,” such as letting the TV babysit, and “10 things I’m gonna say from now on when someone tries to tell me how to parent MY child.” Alpert is honest, humbling, and crass in this irreverent account on parenting. She doesn’t miss a beat, and mothers will find this playful book reassuring and endlessly funny, knowing they’re not the only ones who struggle to get their kids to wipe after going to the bathroom. (May)