"Oh, No! I've Become My Mother": How to Outwit the "Mom Gene" and Have the Life You Want

This book seems at first to be aimed at convincing women their mothers caused every problem in their lives. Reishus promises to help free readers from "the mom gene," those habits of thinking and doing that are passed from mother to daughter, and take responsibility for their actions. But she can't seem to do that without first heaping on the blame. In her world, Mom was either self-absorbed, weak, dysfunctional or controlling, which turned her daughter into a slut, a prude, a control freak or a passive, inert blob. But Reishus, a relationship coach and sex therapist, does have some sound advice. Her theory that our mothers raise us based on what they experienced as children, not in reaction to our personalities, makes great sense. She recommends that you ask yourself whether your mother would be your friend if she weren't your mother—an important first step in determining whether you're compatible or whether "you can move on and not try to please her any longer." It takes patience to filter out the useful information, but determined readers, especially those with serious mother issues, will feel rewarded for their effort. Agent, Joelle Delbourgo. Today Show appearance. (Jan.)