Finding Hope When a Child Dies: What Other Cultures Can Teach Us

As in her previous work (After Death), Miller again looks to other cultures for inspiration--in this case for alternative ways to deal with the intense grief following the death of a child. A psychotherapist and founder of the Institute for the Study of the Afterlife, Miller repeats here to the point of redundancy that Judeo-Christian culture has ""no language"" for describing this grief. She recommends adopting the rituals of groups such as the Hindus, West African Yorubas, Native Americans and the Spiritists of Brazil to make up for what she perceives as Western inadequacies. Drawing on client case studies, Miller posits, for example, that the Baha'i belief in destiny can serve as an antidote to the tendency of parents to take responsibility for a child's death. Inspired by an Afro-Brazilian tradition, she further suggests that bereaved parents renew their faith by regarding the experience as an initiation that results in a deepened spiritual understanding of the loss. Although Miller's approach may be useful to some, others who question such concepts as communing with the dead and reincarnation will find little solace in it. Agent, Barbara Lowenstein. (Aug.)