Love for the Living: Meditations on the Meaning of Marriage and Life

His 28-year-old sister's death in a motorcycle accident in Jamaica roused clinical psychologist Saferstein from what he calls his ""Restless Period"" of vague dissatisfaction and unhappiness, spurring him to reignite his marriage and begin planning to have a third child. He effectively passes on the lessons he learned during that time, offering advice on love and relationships, marriage and family. Examining his early life with an alcoholic father, a mother who was a Holocaust survivor and an older brother suffering from mental illness, Saferstein advises readers to ""Mourn Losses Together,"" ""Nurture Friendships,"" ""Apologize When Necessary,"" ""Embrace Conflict"" and ""Do Less Out of Obligation."" His prose is clear and simple--so simple, in fact, that he occasionally sounds as if he's trying to explain a complex concept to a child. His thoughtful insights are also marred by a few snide remarks about ""New Age"" people, with whom he seems to fear being associated since many of his views are commonly linked to New Age thought (e.g., ""Trust Your Destiny,"" ""Embrace the Present,"" ""Find Work That Is Meaningful""). Saferstein's at his best when he's more introspective: a passage in which he describes a visit to his childhood home successfully introduces the reader to the boy inside the author, and his account of the mature love within his long and bumpy marriage rings deep and true. Saferstein admonishes fellow therapists who only listen and don't offer anything back to their patients; despite a few distracting lapses, his book gives back in abundance. Agent, Anne Rittenburg. (July)