cover image With or Without a Man: Taking Control of Your Life as a Single Woman

With or Without a Man: Taking Control of Your Life as a Single Woman

Karen Gail Lewis. Bull Publishing Company, $18.95 (320pp) ISBN 978-0-923521-50-9

""If it weren't for wanting to be with a man, the single life can be quite satisfying."" Psychotherapist Lewis hits the nail on the head in her seminal handbook for heterosexual women who are postponing living full, ""adult lives"" because they're biding their time in what they hope is the transitional stage of being single. All women, whether married or single, she asserts, have the same basic needs for intimacy, a healthy self-image and sexual expression; without a man, a single woman must work more diligently to fulfill each of these fundamental needs. To help women do so, Lewis offers nine worthy ""tasks"" (""being grounded,"" ""making a decision about children,"" etc.), followed by opportunities for reflection and self-assessmentDa well-thought-out road map for women to travel beyond feeling overwhelmed by value judgments (theirs and everyone else's) about why they're not married. She encourages women in their mid-30s to their late-60s to recognize ""this distinction: You have no control over when an appropriate man will fit in your life, but you do have control over making the life that you have a good oneDfor however long you have it."" Well written, motivational and practical, Lewis's guide offers single women fresh and detailed advice for creating a happy, meaningful life. Like the 1995 bestselling Flying Solo, Lewis's book provides single women a bracing perspectiveDand an action plan. With its broad appeal, this title is well suited for reading groups. (Nov. 1)