My Answer Is No... If That's Okay with You: How Women Can Say NO and (Still) Feel Good about It

Nanette Gartrell, Author Free Press $24 (254p) ISBN 978-1-4165-4693-1

Gartrell's new book gives women important, practical tools for saying ""No"" gracefully and without guilt. Women are especially bad at saying ""No,"" Gartrell writes, because of ""our deeply rooted need for connection"": an old struggle between being considerate and being assertive that often leads to overcommitment, which in turn can cause exhaustion and, in some cases, a long-lived abusive relationship. Taking one relationship group at a time, Gartrell covers the basics (parents, dates and mates, friends and work) before moving on to more tricky, emotionally treacherous territory like assault and harassment, doctors and psychologists, and the dying. Including excellent tools and work management advice for women in the military, Gartrell's guide is more about sticking up for oneself, and putting a stop to abusive situations, than freeing up more ""me time"" for overcommitted women. As such, much of the advice here will help anyone with a problem saying ""No,"" man or woman.