cover image My Husband Betty: Love, Sex, and Life with a Crossdresser

My Husband Betty: Love, Sex, and Life with a Crossdresser

Helen Boyd. Seal Press (CA), $16.95 (304pp) ISBN 978-1-56025-515-4

A straight woman who has been married several years to a crossdressing man gives a thoughtful account of their relationship (as well as the relationships of other crossdressers she knows) in this forthright and revelatory book.""Instead of putting a 'pretty face' on crossdressing,"" Boyd writes,""I think this book paints a more realistic picture."" Her interest is as much in the broader issues of love and acceptance, denial and repression, human nature and sexual identity as it is in the who, when, why and how of crossdressing. Boyd shares personal and often intensely private moments in order to illustrate her findings, describing her husband's ritual for getting dressed as a woman and candidly admitting that she once believed that she would never be able to accept his behavior. Particularly sharp is her chapter on gendered politics, which takes to task members of the crossdressing community who isolate themselves""from all the groups who could otherwise educate and liberate them: the feminist community, the gay and lesbian communities."" Though such comments may be uncharacteristically harsh for a book that by and large supports crossdressers and their actions, Boyd's opinions lend her discussion a critical viewpoint and comprehensiveness that it might not have had otherwise. Boyd, who founded the online support group CDOD, helps out newbies to the topic by making distinctions among phrases like""transgendered"" and""transvestite"" that are sometimes unknowingly used interchangeably and by summarizing the history of and research into the behavior. Honest and well researched, this book is likely to become an indispensable guide for woman who are trying to forge stable, accepting relationships with crossdressing men. Given the topic and Boyd's approach, it is a shame that the author still felt the need to mask her true identity by using a nom de plume.