How to Be a Saint: An Extremely Weird and Mildly Sacrilegious History of the Catholic Church’s Biggest Names

Late Show writer Sidley debuts with a delightfully irreverent rundown of Catholic saints and beliefs. Loosely framing the book as a guide to canonization (“Heaven has received many talented applicants for sainthood over the course of forever, so it may take a while to process your application.... On the plus side there’s no concept of time in heaven”), Sidley lays out the basics of Catholic doctrine and the steps required for sainthood, beginning with dying and concluding with performing a posthumous miracle (the most common of which are medical—“healings, cures, restoration of lost abilities... basically anything that would make a great episode of House”). Interspersed throughout are discussions of specific saints, including those who probably weren’t real (St. Christopher), “nepo baby” saints (St. Basil the Great’s entire family–“enough for a bobsled team, including alternates”—is canonized), and who rejected marriage (like St. Agatha, who’s “unfortunately commemorated with cakes shaped like her lopped-off tits”). Sidley’s ribald tone is rooted in a genuine affection for her subject that shines through in the granular, informative, and sometimes bizarre details she shares about Catholic tradition. Readers will enjoy themselves. (Aug.)