Zen and the Art of Dealing with Difficult People: How to Learn from your Troublesome Buddhas

Mindfulness teacher Westmoquette (The Mindful Universe) draws on personal experiences of loss and emotional abuse in this helpful guide to facing fear, letting go of negativity, and finding new ways of dealing with difficult situations. He begins with an introduction to the benefits of mindfulness, the functions of emotional regulation and “dysregulation,” and various strategies for coping with stress, such as breathing exercises. The core of the book covers “troublesome buddhas” (those one struggles to get along with), including coworkers, friends and family, and even oneself—and offers examples of ways to deal with each. For instance, Westmoquette shows how an office manager used mindfulness to help him make difficult hiring decisions. Another man found that his frustration with a neighbor’s habit of parking directly in front of his house (leaving him only a half space to park) served as a “mini-revelation” of how his mind dealt with strife. Westmoquette concludes with a discussion of how suffering creates the potential for awakening, and implores readers to act from a place of compassion. Readers who enjoy the work of Thich Nhat Hanh should take a look. (Dec.)