Lessons I Have Unlearned: Because Life Doesn’t Look Like It Did in the Pictures

Former chaplain Gildea debuts with a brisk account of her journey into Christianity and the pitfalls of pursuing perfection. Hypersensitive to societal pressures to be perfect and happy, Gildea struggled to live up to unrealistic expectations and suffered from an eating disorder in her early 20s. Realizing she had fallen under the spell of an illusory “tripartite structure” of life (“set-up, development, resolution”), Gildea argues young people need to unlearn lessons from popular culture and social media in order to live happier lives, because “life isn’t like the movies.” This unlearning, based on gradual disillusionment with these false narratives, is enthusiastically explored alongside lessons from the Bible, including the story of Ruth and Naomi’s loyalty and Peter’s pure devotion, which demonstrate how “God’s love truly is unconditional.” For Gildea, grace allows one to do away with unhealthy comparisons because “compared to the source of all righteousness and goodness, the variation between us humans is utterly insignificant.” Similarly, the pursuit of perfection or of unrealistic versions of happiness will inevitably lead to angst. Gildea skips between modern examples—including the 2017 Fyre Festival debacle and Francis Fukuyama’s “end of history” declaration—and biblical stories with ease to make her arguments. Religious millennials will want to take a look. (July)