Broken to Brave: Your Courageous Act of Healing After Intimate Betrayal

In her empowering debut, therapist Gustafson guides readers through recovery from intimate partner betrayal, defined here as a sexual or emotional violation of the (spoken or unspoken) “relationship agreement.” Outlining a multistep recovery process, she explains how readers can take stock of the extent of the betrayal; process messy, complex emotions on their own timeline; adjust to the new reality of their relationship (whether it’s ended or been redefined); and rediscover themselves by reviving friendships and taking up new hobbies. She also offers advice specific to Christian readers, warning them to be wary of well-meaning faith “wisdom” that forgiveness must be immediate and unequivocal. While readers should eventually forgive their partners, Gustafson contends, it’s largely for their own peace of mind and need not happen on a specific timeline or lead to reconciliation. Drawing on her own efforts to recover from her husband’s infidelity, Gustafson outlines a flexible, holistic philosophy that gives due to the messiness of human emotions (“You cannot heal your heart with your head”) while clarifying that recovery is possible. The result is a compassionate guide to a common but hard-to-discuss relationship issue. (Jan.)