Say Nephew: On Boyhood, Unclehood, and Queer Mentorship

Essayist and editor Pfau debuts with an elegant and smart collection exploring the role of gay uncles in queer culture. Inspired by his formative relationship with his gay uncle, Bruce, Pfau considers the prevalence of the “trendy portmanteau” guncle and questions why uncles are the family members most often associated with “queer men’s tutelage” (he speculates that it’s because of their tendency to be unmarried and childless and their “oblique and versatile” relation to younger generations). He reflects on spending much of his childhood listening attentively to Bruce’s stories and taking notes, and seeking as an adult to emulate Bruce’s confidence and charm. Such efforts include cruising in a bathhouse, serving as a nude model for a photographer, and taking his therapist to a leather bar to overcome his anxiety about flirting. Elsewhere, Pfau explores the avuncular nature of intergenerational male friendships in queer communities and the way that heroes—for Pfau, the artist Robert Rauschenberg—support the development of queer identities. Pfau seamlessly blends memoir with art and literary criticism, and his eloquent prose and wit make this stand out. He is a writer worth keeping an eye on. (May)