The Parent’s Guide to Divorce: How to Protect Your Child’s Mental and Emotional Health Through a Breakup or Separation

Navigating divorce as a parent presents a unique set of challenges, but putting children’s needs at the forefront can help everyone stay grounded, explains psychoanalyst and parent coach Komisar (Chicken Little the Sky Isn’t Falling) in this practical manual. The key to mitigating trauma, according to Komisar, is a “child-healthy divorce,” which involves prioritizing children’s mental and emotional well-being and continuing to approach parenting as a joint act. Making changes slowly, like ensuring the kids continue to attend the same school; involving children in such decisions as how to decorate their room in a parent’s new home; and anticipating conflicts with the ex-spouse, including disagreements over custody, are all ways in which parents can promote a sense of continuity and rebuild trust with their kids in a time of tremendous change. Leaning into new traditions, like exchanging gifts on Christmas Eve if the other parent has custody Christmas Day, or getting a new pet if the family dog now lives with the ex, can be a cause for celebration when life feels heavy. Komisar’s message remains consistent throughout: put children first, and be honest but neutral when discussing the other parent. This is a valuable resource for parents who are separating. (Mar.)