Conversion Therapy Dropout: A Queer Story of Faith and Belonging

Rodriguez, cofounder of Church Clarity, an organization that helps queer people find gay-affirming congregations, debuts with a moving memoir about his struggles to “keep my faith without losing my soul” as a queer Christian. The author grew up feeling like a perennial misfit in Peoria, Ill., and found a sense of belonging with a Christian youth group as a teen, though his faith began to crack when he saw a youth leader “rejected” by the church after coming out. After high school he followed another group leader to Washington State to help him build a church youth group, but the mentor found gay porn on Rodriguez’s laptop, outed him, and framed him as a “dangerous predator.” Still committed to the church, Rodriguez signed up for conversion therapy that promised to help him overcome his “sexual brokenness” with a bizarre mix of “disciplined effort, behavior modification, and divine intervention” that involved, among other things, growing a beard and joining a gym. After eight years of conversion therapy, the author found a support group that sought to build “bridges between the church and the LGBTQ+ community.” Rodriguez’s brutal honesty is affecting, and he powerfully draws out how the evangelical church weaponizes Christian doctrine to “other” gay people and convince believers salvation is conditional on rigid adherence to conservative values. The result is an unflinching account of finding a faith that fits. (May)

Correction: An earlier version of this review contained inaccuracies about when the author moved to Washington State and how long he was in conversion therapy.